watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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