Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
