i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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