Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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