we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
