I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I'm bleeding and have questions
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
