Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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