White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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