are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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