my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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