I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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