about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
