What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Randomize
