your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
