Dual....:-)
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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