I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i was born a porn star she said
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just want to make out with him forever
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
