Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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