this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
