dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
