if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
third nipple confirmed
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
