Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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