I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
