Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
