just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
