do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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