I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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