Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
