And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
