just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize
