yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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