I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
