I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
