hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
