Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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