But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
