you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
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