Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
