You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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