I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize