Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
