did you get engaged???
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
