if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
