We won't sleep together?
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
