Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
