I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
