Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
