I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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