Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
