just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
