sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
